Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Things I Forget All the Time

I just finished a very good book about a woman who is diagnosed with "early on-set Alzhiemer's", (Still Alice, I highly recommend it). Since reading it I find myself worried about every little failure in my memory, and then I remember that I've always forgotten stuff all the time...I keep telling my kids "my head is like a toilet; you can only put so much shit in it at once".
My memory is definitely selective; I can remember ridiculous things, like people's maiden names or where we've seen that actor before, but completely forget to pick up the drycleaning, or where I put the chicken after I came home from grocery shopping. (Hint: follow the smell in a couple of days.) When I regularly found myself looking after other people's children, I lived in fear of forgetting to pick them up from something. (Fortunately, the one time that DID happen, I managed to high-tail it right smart back to the school yard before they freaked out, but not before they noticed I was gone. It took a while before they trusted me again.)

Some things I forget with a tedious regularity are...

  • The Alphabet. When I put things in alphabetical order, I have to mentally run through it Every. Single. Time....."Q, R, S, T !"
  • The Reusable Shopping Bags. Sure, they seem like a good idea, (although, I still have to buy plastic kitchen bags, so exactly HOW are they helping the environment? Does the environment care whether or not I paid for the plastic I'm throwing out or if I got it free with my groceries?) but I forget to put them in the car at all, let alone bring them into the grocery store with me.
  • The Salon's Phone Number. I have worked at that salon for twenty-seven freaking years, and occasionally, my brain completely crashes, and I have to really think about the phone number that has been the exact same number since October of 1982.
  • Stuff in the Oven. I regularly put muffin tins or cookie sheets in the oven temporarily, instead of taking them downstairs to the cabinet where I usually keep them. I habitually forget that I have done so, and preheat the oven to bake something, only to find myself with 4 leppin' hot pans and no where to put them. I had to be forcibly stopped from putting anything plastic anywhere near the stove for the very same reason.
  • Returning Movies. I don't bother even renting movies anymore, because I will forget to return them, until Blockbuster threatens me with a horrendous "restocking" bill, and I probably didn't even get around to watching the movie.
  • Horizontal/Vertical. I have to think twice when pressed to use one term or another.... "Horizon=Horizontal".
  • Some Names. We have a couple of clients at the shop in the Sherry/Cheryl/Sharon vein, and they confound me every single time. I have to make sure I look at my day-sheet and repeat the name several times before I can trust myself to speak. It does not help that their last names are McLean/McLeod/McLaird, I couldn't even BEGIN to team those up.

1 comment:

Erin said...

Oh my -- when you said the alphabet, I laughed right out loud. I feel so much better about myself. I was just looking up something in the phone book yesterday and caught myself singing a portion of it. What's the matter with us? I can sing you all the words to a Bon Jovi song included all the grunts and "ooooohs" in the right places but I can't remember my ABC's. At least I'm not alone.