Tuesday, January 12, 2010

How I Spent My Day, Another Day

The Women's Section of the 1975 Eaton's catalogue was bad enough, but you should get a load of the Men's Department....even worse, if you can believe it. I understand that it is entirely the nature of "style" that it changes drastically from decade to decade, but it's really hard to wrap one's head around the idea that any of this stuff EVER looked cool or hip or attractive or even less than laughable, as if that was that was the height of your ambitions. Also, note the collective fear of showing your ears...clearly a phobia rampant in the 70's....
Exhibit A:

You know why these are "no-iron" shirts? Because they are made out of abominated chemical compounds that melt when heated higher than room temperature.Those synthetic monstrosities just last and last and last. (The Mister had several of these shirts when we got married, and I made him throw them out. But not because they needed ironing!) Don't you love the patterns? The patterns that re-arrange your neurons and make your retinas twitch? Between you and me? The guy on the bottom left is wearing "guyliner".

Ahhh, the Leisure Suit. Nothing says "The 70's" quite like the Leisure Suit. And although they look sort of like very formal polyester pajamas, they look anything but comfortable. In the top picture, the two men look like they are doing a very awkward version of "The Chicken Dance", and the two in the big picture look somewhat happier,but as if they have just been caught doing something they shouldn't have. But what do you expect for $29.95?

Whoa, dude....dial down the pose, please. I know what's in those pants, but I don't want to know what's in those pants, got it?? Love the selection on the right: "Brain Spasm", "Clown School Showdown", and "Brown-tastic Fiesta!""The Toughest Denim We Sell" Really? Do a lot of Hell's Angels buy the denim jacket with the ginormous fuzzy, white collar? Who loves these guys? I do. I very much do. Where every other model in the catalogue looks like he could reasonably shoot for a spot in the "Village People", these two look like real men. Look how proud Earl there up in the left hand corner is. And so he should....apart from winning the Shriner's "Man of the Year" award, he also scored a modelling gig in the Eaton's catalogue.

"So, the other day, the guys and I were standing around in our underwear, like we do, and we got to talking about what would happen if we pulled our waistbands up EVEN HIGHER".

I'm sure the next generation will find our fashion choices equally criminal, but at least we fearlessly showed our ears.


Erin said...

OH my ~ tears are running down my cheeks laughing at your, once again, super hilarious commentary. As soon as I saw the guy in the nasty pose, I couldn't wait to read what you were going to say!! And Earl, you know, the Shriners Man of the Year...oh, that one is so funny. Keep reading the catalogue and posting!!

Jude said...

I was thrilled to see the follow up posting of the men's part of the catalog. You didn't disappoint either in fact you out did yourself. This was soo fckn funny! I heart Earl.

2momswithaplan said...

Oh my! I'm at work right now and people keep looking at me wondering why I'm laughing so loud. So funny! I just love the underwear commentary! LOL