- When I am driving and see a cat I yell "kitty!". Cows are mooed at. Pigs get a pass.
- Sometimes when I get home and there is no one else here, I yell "hello!" to the empty house, to startle the serial killer waiting in the basement.
- When I leave the house, I tell Toby that I'm leaving him in charge, and in case anything happens to us, he is to avenge our deaths.
- Whenever I hear about the rap singer, Fifty Cent, I immediately re-say his name in my head as "Fiddy Cen". I usually say it out loud, too.
- When I buys shoes, I always check to see that I actually have the correct size and that I have both a left and a right.
- When I pack my groceries at the store, I think of the bags as a Tetris game, and try to get the stuff to make a perfect rectangle.
- I "ruin" songs in my head. I make up lyrics that make no sense whatsoever, and I can never hear the correct lyrics ever again....."Hold me closer Tony Danza, count the head lice on the highway", or "another one rides the bus! And another gets on and another gets on, another one rides the bus!"
- I try to picture certain people's faces as if they were born a hundred years ago or before that. As in "I can see her Victorian face", or "He looks like he could be medieval."
- I hate to throw out photographs, because what if the person in them becomes famous someday, and I've thrown away a fortune?
- I eat apples the same way, every time: first, you eat around the "equator", then turn the apple so that the stem is up, eat all around the top, then spin the apple so that the bottom is on the top, eat all around the bottom. It's the only way to eat an apple.
- When travelling in an airplane, I wonder if anyone I know is looking at the plane. When looking at a plane, wonder if anyone I know is on board. Because, you know, that plane up in the air at 30,000 feet that is clearly not landing anywhere near me might contain one of my cousins from overseas, or Beyonce.
Saturday, April 28, 2012
Weird Things I'm Pretty Sure Only I Do.
Everyone has their quirks, and some of us have more than others. And, like most everyone, I have a few habits that I'm pretty sure are mine and mine alone. I'd be amazed if anyone else does this....