How To Make A Cup of Tea

How An Adult Makes A Cup of Tea:
1. Fill kettle.
2. Boil kettle.
3. Pour over tea bag in cup. Wait a minute or two.
4. Take out tea bag.
5. Add 1 package sweetener, 1 dollop of milk.
6. Stir, drink.

How An 11-Year-Old Makes A Cup of Tea:
1. Fill kettle to brim.
2. Dump out half of it.
3. Plug in kettle, set it to boil.
4. Get interested in computer game, forget all about the kettle, come back to it 15 minutes later.
5. Dump out water, start all over.
6. Make sure kitchen is awash before proceeding.
7. Choose mug.
8. Choose another mug, because first one is "too blue".
9. Choose tea.
10.Choose another kind of tea.
11. Ask everyone in the vicinity what kind of tea you should choose.
12. Choose tea.
13. After kettle has boiled for the third time, pour over tea bag in adequately blue mug.
14. Stir furiously for about 3 minutes.
15. Rummage vigorously in cupboard overhead for anything good to eat.
16. Decide there is nothing worth eating in cupboard overhead.
17. Go downstairs to see if anything good is lurking there.
18. Decide that peanuts and licorice go well with tea.
19. Go back upstairs and stir tea again.
20. When tea is approximately the colour and consistency of crude oil, take out tea bag.
21. Add 4 or 5 heaping teaspoons of sugar, with a clean spoon.
22. Taste, and add a little more.
23. Add enough milk to barely change tea's colour.
24. Add a bit more.
25. Pour out a bit of the tea into the sink to allow for more milk. Make sure you get a whole lot of it all over the counter. Do not wipe it up.
26. Add more milk. Stir with an entirely new, clean spoon.
27. Taste, and add more sugar.
28. Decide that you should probably just bring the sugar bowl down to the family room with you.
29. Stir tea once more, prefrerably with a clean spoon.
30. Bring tea, sugar bowl and snack of choice down to family room.
31. Complain that your tea is cold, and leave it on the coffee table to be knocked over by the cat.
32. Lather, rinse, repeat.